VAULT 2023 picks – weeks 3 and 4

2nd in our series highlighting the pick of the Vault Festival now moves on to weeks 3 and 4. I hope one or more of the shows here is of interest to you.

Look out for features/reviews for some of these productions as the festival approaches and progresses.

Picks for weeks 1 and 2

Week 3

All By Myself [REVIEW]

POV: you’re a vlogger. A productive (but chill!) DIYing vlogger. It’s the end of the world. What do you do when everyone’s left the internet?

By: Part of the Main. Studio. Tickets here.

Borders [REVIEW]

Two men meet on Grindr. One in Israel, the other in Lebanon. A moving script and performance brings their relationship to life as the border separating them heats up.

By: Junction Theatre & Performance. Crescent. Tickets here.

Death Suits You

We all feel underappreciated at work, and Death is no exception – A new perspective on death, by Death.

By: Sam Hooper. Cavern. Tickets here.

I F***ed You In My Spaceship [FEATURE]

Two couples launch an extraterrestrial game of shifting relationship dynamics threatened by invasion, alienation, and abduction, when they invite a stranger into their homes with hope of sparking new life.

By: Louis Emmitt-Stern. Cavern. Tickets here.

Love Me or I’ll Kill Myself

Join Faith on her quest into Love’s dark enchantments, and if there’s any life worth living without them. A madcap saga of passion, crushing despair and salvation by bath bombs.

By: Faith Brandon. Cage. Tickets here.


MOLKA is a multidisciplinary theatre performance about the rise of spycam crimes in South Korea and globally. Crimes which predominantly target women.

By: Maja Laskowska and Taeyun Kim. Pit. Tickets here.

Patient 4620

A once famous artist, admitted to the Raventhorne Institution and then never heard from again. An eerie journey into a missing artist’s mind. For solo-entry.

By: Dread Falls Theatre. Void. Tickets here.

Professor Slug’s House of Bugs

Professor Slug is an eccentric expert on invertebrates who helps bugs out with their buggy problems – and you can too! Proudly supported by conservation charity Buglife.

By: Maxwell Tyler. Cage. Tickets here.


Life in a vending machine is never easy. Sparkling must rally her fellow soft drink buddies and hatch a plan to escape before the closure of the leisure centre.

By: Thirsty Productions. Network Theatre. Tickets here.

Side FX

When it comes to contraception, things are better than they were – but that’s a low bar. Join Katie for a camp, chaotic cabaret about the Pill. And Vampires.

By: Katie Paterson. Network Theatre. Tickets here.

This Is The Land

A polyphony of stories resound from beneath the earth. Five elemental figures reconnect us with something forgotten, rewinding our imagination towards a future beyond societies ‘prescribed’ expectation.

By: Red Room Productions. Network Theatre. Tickets here.

Under Heaven’s Eyes [PREVIOUS REVIEW]

Was George Floyd’s killing a turning point or false dawn?’ Since Michael, a Black Londoner viewed footage of George’s murder it’s remained in his mind throwing his life into free-fall.

By: Christopher Tajah. Network Theatre. Tickets here.

Week 4

An Apology to Lady Gaga

Matty has disappeared again, his boyfriend Tim left to wait and worry. A kaleidoscopic portrait of a relationship divided by “outness”, celebrating the audacious courage of modern queer relationships.

By: Scram & Scrum Theatre. Cage. Tickets here.


His roommate has everything: muscles, a growing Instagram following, a new boyfriend. He does not.A story of body image, jealousy, and self-acceptance. What if you’re not Buff?

By: Scott Le Crass. Crescent. Tickets here.

Compositor E

An apprentice typesetter works on the First Folio of Shakespeare, while processing the recent trauma of his mother’s execution for witchcraft.

By: Charlie Dupré. Network Theatre. Tickets here.

Degenerate [REVIEW]

In this comedy-horror show, Maria Teresa Creasey surveys the desolate landscape between desirability and… death. Facing the looming shadow of the change, she has three options: fight, flight or bite!

By: this is not a test. Crypt. Tickets here.

Far Out

Three space explorers search for a new planet in this wacky, queer sci-fi adventure! Earth’s all burnt out, but there’s still hope. Do humans deserve a second chance?

By: L Squared Theatre. Studio. Tickets here.

Grey Area [FEATURE]

Where is the boundary between self-care and egotism in LGBTQIA+ relationships affected by mental health issues? Through mirrors and reflections, the show unveils unspoken, difficult truths about love and morality.

By: Homing Bird Theatre. Network Theatre. Tickets here.

Gun to Your Head

Meet Dakota and Bede: two teenage misfits on the run. GTYH is the highly-anticipated full-length stage premiere by Simon Jaggers. A punk-production exploring the brilliance of youth in darkest England.

By: Simon Jaggers. Cavern. Tickets here.

House of Burlesque: PoliTITS

House of Burlesque are back for 2023 with PoliTITs Рa sizzling, showgirl satire of contemporary culture going back to the subversive roots of British Burlesque. Risqué, raucous and rhinestoned.

By: House of Burlesque. The Flair Ground @ The Forge. Tickets here.

How We Begin [REVIEW]

A new play about love, queerness and trying to make enough room in your calendar to sleep with your best friend.

By: Elizabeth Benbow and Antonia Georgieva. Pit. Tickets here.

The Kick Inside [FEATURE]

Cat Lady! Dried up spinster! Barren ghost! Frigid witch!Poignant and revelatory, ‘The Kick Inside’ is an autobiographical performance scrutinising and celebrating one woman’s decision to remain childfree.

By: Kerensa Diball. Cage. Tickets here.

Right Dishonourable Friend [REVIEW]

I’m a people person, Daniel, people love me. I’ll make a bet with you – 5 minutes with the normals and they’ll be calling me the ‘People’s Princess’.’

By: Metamorph Theatre. Cage. Tickets here.

The Unconventionals

Trapped outside of Heaven (in Charing Cross), the ‘unconventional’ Wilfred must wander through their memories of 1930s queer London one last time, confronting their past before facing their future.

By: Chromatic Creative. The Flair Ground @ The Forge. Tickets here.


A bin man swaps steel-toed boots for stilettos to chase his dream of becoming a drag queen. This heartfelt, hilarious and Offie-nominated play stars former Jersey Boy/Refuse Loader, Joe Leather.

By: Joe Leather. Pit. Tickets here.